THE JOURNEY THROUGH HER EYES: On Becoming by Toke Makinwa

book review



Hmm….what a life, what a story….!






Starting off with this picture……


Well yeahhhh……..we’ve waited too long for this.

I read the book in one sitting. It was quite an interesting read. So many emotions crept through me as I went from page to page. There was sadness, surprise, irritation, confusion, and even so, anger. So much pain in this world, I murmured to myself in between hisses and sighs. More so, I was baffled as to how people could hold on tightly to things even when it was obvious that the rope would snap and fling you straight into wall. I may still be in the journey to self discovery but I do know this certainly about myself…I am very lazy when it comes to relationships. The moment I begin to spot weird behaviors, I withdraw. But then, there’s this thing called ‘love’ that leaves many blind and I wonder…..

In the book, Toke points out that the narration was not a tell all, but a must tell. Well, I totally agree. The book gave a brief insight into her background and focused mainly on her journey through thick and thin with Maje. The relationship started as a fairytale and gradually took a sour turn. The battles of dealing with the other women, insecurities, mistrust, and deceit caused a dark cloud to settle on the relationship, Toke being the supposed victim. There were signs from all angles hinting her to run for dear life  but she waited nine years hoping for sun to shine again. Hell or high water, she was determined to make it work between her and Maje.

But it was not meant to be……

One interesting fact is how many of us wear pain so well that other people can hardly tell. Reading certain parts of the book, many puzzles began to fit and some other things became clear to me. Things like how I suddenly heard that Toke was married. I began to recall Toke’s reactions to certain issues on ‘Moments with Mo”….her face never gave anything away. There was one episode she confessed to have slapped her Maje. She said it really casually and the other ladies sort of took it lightly…like ‘oh really…you did?’. There was this other time she talked about how women were made to bear so much in marriage….blablabla. Again, her face gave nothing away. It only seemed like she was stating her opinions. So many other things like that she had indirectly pointed out overtime. If only we knew…..


To be honest, I don’t really know what I expected from the book before I read it. I simply knew it would clarify the rumors and misconceptions about the issues between Toke and Maje. Well, it did. A whole lot! And probably a little too much!! The book was probably a good idea as no one interview could have revealed so much.

However, the book did seem like a very long essay. Something like those we wrote in WAEC exams with themes given. ‘Write an essay that ends with the saying….had I known’ or ‘write a story that explains the saying….don’t cry over spilt milk”. And then you venture into a fanatic race of brainstorming…after which you end up with a story that doesn’t quite fit the theme but you kinda just play with words in the end and patch the theme around the conclusion.

Disregarding all inadequacies and whatever the motive behind writing the book may be, there are still a lot of lessons to be learnt. I still respect Toke’s courage to be able to expose such vulnerability and accept her faults. We really hope she gets to that point of total healing and hey, finally BECOMES…..




  1. Good site! I really love how it is easy on my eyes and the data are well written. I am wondering how I could be notified when a new post has been made. I have subscribed to your RSS which must do the trick! Have a nice day!